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I’m excited to be heading to Seattle this week to give a presentation to the Seattle Public Schools titled “Intensity Through the Ages—Celebrating Our Children’s Passion, Creativity, and Excitability” (it’s free and no registration is required, so if you live in the area, please consider stopping by!). The title, however, is just the beginning. Parents and teachers often attend talks such as this one to understand their children better, and they come away knowing that there is much to understand and celebrate about themselves, as well.
What are your social-emotional needs? Intellectual needs? Creative needs? Physical needs? Twice-exceptional needs? Not your children’s. Yours.
Are you meeting them?
If the very question makes you squirm with discomfort (Sure, my kids are gifted, but me??), spend some time with the following resources, then comment here on your own experience with living as an intense adult and learning to celebrate your own passion, creativity, and excitability.
The Intellectual Mother Meets the Artistic Mother?
In a thought-provoking blog post that has stayed with me since I read it, Casey asks candid questions of herself and us about finding balance (from her delightful blog The Sprightly Writer):
I’m slowly coming to the realization that I’ve been on the wrong track. I’m slowing down the hyper-analysis and I’m re-thinking my approach to my life. I’ve only been increasingly agitated and cranky and picking fights with my husband and this isn’t working anymore. Reading and writing my frustrations away aren’t really helping but making them become more entrenched in my thought processes. I think I’m imbalanced. Ha…no, not crazy imbalanced. Not too much anyway.
Why Spell it Dyslexia?
CEO Eric Edmeades writes about the challenges and possibilities for dyslexic entrepreneurs (thank you to the Eides at Dyslexic Advantage for the link!)
Many dyslexics are super creative – as if they traded one type of thought for another. I suspect that many would have been brilliant lawyers, professors and executives. The challenge is that to get to most of those positions they would have to deal with the education system, exams and systems that measure intelligence and capability in very narrow terms.
Organizing a Divergent Mind
If you are a divergent thinker who is naturally drawn toward the “look, shiny!” parts of life, you will enjoy this post by Lisa Lauffer on the ongoing quest to get organized:
So far, everything I really need to do gets done. But I find this existence a little stressful, and sometimes I wonder if I could accomplish more and feel more at peace if I became more organized. Now as you can probably tell, “more organized” isn’t that high of an expectation around here. I’ve learned that I will never become an organization maven. My brain isn’t built that way. Checklists and day-at-a-time organizers don’t move me. Instead, anyone who knows me knows how I love stickie notes. I come alive brainstorming projects when I post colorful small stickie notes to gigantic stickie notes adhered to my wall.
I hope to see some of you in Seattle!
[...] I checked my email and found that Lisa Rivero at Everyday Intensity wrote a wonderful piece on Meeting the Needs of Intense Grownups after being inspired by this blog post. I’m deeply honored to be included in her post and [...]
Lisa,
Hi, friend.
I was drinking my morning coffee and checking my email when I saw your update. I opened it up and the first thing I saw was my blog post being highlighted. I was so tickled.
Are you holding any seminars near the Chicago/NW Indiana/Southern Michigan area in the future? Your presentation sounds wonderful!
I’m going to send you an email…by the way. I think it would be nice to ‘chat’ outside of commenting on blog posts.
And yes, I am looking forward to hearing what other adults do to meet their intense needs.
Blessings,
Casey
Casey, I feel privileged to have been able to mention your new blog! Your voice is thoughtful and fresh and always a welcome addition to my inbox. As soon as I’m back home from my Seattle trip, I would love to begin a more “intense” email conversation.
Hugs,
Lisa
A timely post for me.
I certainly have been feeling that my needs (creative, social-emotional, and intellectual) are not being met at the moment. Being a stay at home mom is tough in that regard. I’m very focused on my family, but I haven’t really focused on my needs. I’m going to try and go back to work when my youngest goes to kindergarten this fall, and I find myself not really knowing what I want to do. Thank you for introducing me to The Sprightly Writer blog. It is a valuable resource. Wish I lived closer to attend your presentation! Let me know if you ever get to the other coast. 
Monica, I’m so glad that the post was meaningful to you. When our son entered kindergarten, I began filling up my time by volunteering in the school (at the library, and by serving on the GT district committee). While those are certainly not bad things to do, I think it would have been better if I had used the time to explore more of my own, non-parenting related interests. Something to think about…
I’m sure I’ll get to the east coast before long. I hope to meet you in person some day.
~ Lisa
I like my piles. Your books are in them.
Lisa: I expect that Seattle was marvelous. Hope to be there in July. Are you attending SENG? The post is so relevant. So many gifted adults still see the word gifted as a 4 letter word for themselves. It is their parental duty (yes out of love) to see their gifted children’s needs are met. Yet one of the best ways we can do that is by meeting our own needs as gifted adults – thus better mentors.
I continued to work while the children were growing up (2 gifted sons). I volunteered extensively with them even while working. However, I did make a lot of choices based on their needs. I did continue to explore both with my interests and theirs which provided input for the drive of new learning. It was fun to discover how to meet their intellectual curiosity in new ways and see who we could meet. That actually satisfied some of my needs.
Being A Gifted adult is a good thing. Meeting our own needs is a great thing. Thanks so much for what you share, personally and the treasures you find!!
I think I might just be dyslexic. I am an avid reader, and have a wide vocabulary. I do not have a problem with words in books. When I write however, my spelling, grammar, and punctuation go down-hill. I have to enunciate words in my head to spell them correctly. I can’t ever remember the date, and am yet described as being super creative. I like poetry and stories. When I hand write I’m even worse.
Hello everyone,
I am a very distressed stay-at-home mom, isolated form friends and family, and whose intellectual and artistic needs are not met at al1! Just before the birth of my first I completed a doctorate in music, and I worked as a choral and orchestral conductor.
I have a 5 year-old boy who has not attended school yet (“spirited” and showing signs of giftedness)and a sweet girl who will be 2 in June, much more easy-going. I am constantly with them, as we have no sitter, and as mentioned, no family nearby.
I am trying to reach out to women who can understand the difficulty of staying at home with an overactive mind, and who could offer me suggestions on how to cope, resources, anything. I assure you that it could be life-saving. It has been tough.
My husband does not understand where is the problem, and I am not sure anyone near me does, really. Please help if you can! How do you cope? Thank you!
Muriel, I’ve been thinking about your post and the best way to respond. To help you to reach out as you want to do, I’m going to post your comment today and ask for input from others. I hope it helps and that others share their journey and ideas.