Welcome to Day 13 of the July Intensity Project!
31 Days Toward Living with More Intensity & Creativity
After a whirlwind of five days’ worth of overexcitabilities, I don’t know about you, but I’m exhausted! Whew.
As you consider what you’ve learned, and how understanding more about overexcitabilities affects how you view yourself or family members or friends (or even co-workers!), you might have this question: What does this have to do with being gifted?
It’s neither a small nor an easy question, but I believe it is an important one to think about.
Quoted on the Talent Development website (emphases added by me):
“Almost 97 percent of the highly creative suffer from different kinds of overexcitabilities, neuroses, and psychoneuroses.
“So, neurotics and psychoneurotics are a mine of social treasure.
“If their emotionality, talents, interests, and sensitivity were discovered at an early age, society and science would profit.”
Kazimierz Dabrowski – from interview: “The Heroism of Sensitivity,” 1979, published in Advanced Development,Vol 6, Jan 1994
Here is my take on the matter, from the viewpoint of a parent and teacher:
Whereas our traditional, school model of giftedness tends to focus on academic and intellectual potential (not in itself a bad thing, of course), Dabrowski’s theory of personality development and positive disintegration, which includes the overexcitabiltiies, encompasses a broader idea of human potential. Expanding our idea of giftedness to include and appreciate various forms of intensity, emotionality, and sensitivity makes it easier for both children and adults to understand the difference that giftedness makes in their lives, regardless of whether they want to call themselves gifted.
As psychologist and author James Webb says, “gifted” is the best word we’ve got right now for this difference, but it’s far from perfect.
Why is that? First of all, most gifted young people I’ve talked to resist use of the term. They understand what it means and the difference being gifted makes, but being labeled as gifted, especially if that’s the first thing that people learn about them, can cause difficulties they would rather avoid.
“Probably the only single thing all twenty of us agreed on back in New York—in all our lives— was that we hate the word ‘gifted.’ It’s flattering, it’s pleasing, but it alienates us from friends. (On Being Gifted, AAGC, 1978, p. 4)
Everyone brings to any label his or her own understandings, misunderstandings, world views, and prejudices. It might not be right or fair, but some people think that by saying some children are gifted, we are saying those children are more worthy in some way, “more special,” and, for that reason, they resist the idea of the gifted difference altogether. Of course, anyone who lives with giftedness or gifted children knows better, but that doesn’t change the misunderstanding.
However, I have rarely met anyone who disagrees that some people—children and adults—simply live with and have more intensity than other people. That this intensity sometimes makes life wonderful, but that it can also feel like a burden. That their experience of life is somehow different from that of others. Not better or worse, but definitely different.
So, your assignment for today is simply to ponder these questions and come up with your own answers.
What do you think?
Photo credit: Kriss Szkurlatowski
Previous July Intensity Project Posts:
- Day One: List Your Best Qualities…
- Day Two: Wonderfully Weird?
- Day Three: Got Personality?
- Day Four: Celebrate Your Way
- Day Five: Torrance’s Creative Manifesto
- Day Six: A Spork Divergent Thinking Exercise
- Day Seven: The Euphoric Rush of Everyday Life
- Day Eight: Intellectual Intensity
- Day Nine: Pyschomotor Readiness
- Day Ten: The Delight of Beautiful Things (Sensual Excitability)
- Day 11: Our Precious Imagination
- Day 12: The Key of Emotional Overexcitability
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A lot of food for thought–I’ll have to think on this one a bit.
I’ve been trying to think of a comment (versus a full blog post, lol!) to respond to this for HOURS. I absolutely LOVED this, from start to finish, but this:
“However, I have rarely met anyone who disagrees that some people—children and adults—simply live with and have more intensity than other people. That this intensity sometimes make life wonderful, but that it can also feel like a burden. That their experience of life is somehow different from that of others. Not better or worse, but definitely different.”
That almost made me cry. I have called myself a lot of things (many not so positive), but gifted is one I never thought would apply. And yet, there it is, summed up in words I could have written myself, though not nearly as eloquently, in a way that not even I can argue or debate. (And my mother says I would argue with God if I thought I was right.)
Thank you for giving me the gift of a positive word to describe myself, and for shining a positive light on that intensity that can be as wonderful as it can be a burden, as you so aptly put it. Thank you.
Abby, your comment tugs at my heart! I’ve talked about this topic to parents of gifted children, and, more often than not, a mother or father who was there to learn about gifted children has the sudden realization that what we are talking about applies to him or her, too. It’s a profound re-evaluation of oneself, and can be the beginning of seeing a lot of what seemed negative traits in oneself as potentially positive ones.
Your comment about your mother gave me a chuckle! (you know, loving to argue and debate is another gifted/intensity trait, lol)
Hugs to you…